• 1 woman: Sometimes funny, always a goofball. Hugely empathetic to the point of tears on occasion. Runs (inconsistently). Slightly tanned with multiple colored shoes. Watered with Diet Coke to capture best flavor profiles. Wilts near multiple exclamation points.
  • 1 boyfriend: Get the aged variety—9 years older than the woman. Sarcastic. Organized. Adventurous. No ability to sit still. Usually found on the bike or running trails. Wears Navy pilot uniform. Loyal. Loving. Rolls eyes frequently. Makes woman laugh and smile yearlong.
  • 3 boys: Need a small (7), medium (15) and large (19) variety. The medium and large must come from the same tree that yields dirty blond, really skinny produce that run like the wind and cycle everywhere. The large one has been replanted in State College. The small one comes from a different branch, but seems to be emulating the growth of the other two. Super sweet when young. Gets a little more tart with age. All are fun to watch grow.
  • 1 ex-husband: Found in computer and after-school sports climates. Slightly twisted at the knees and prefers to grow near the kids. Dependable and easy to find through the seasons.
  • 1 stepmom: Ensures excellent growth of both the ex-husband and small boy. Pretty sure she keeps the ex-husband tree standing.

Haphazardly toss all ingredients in a bowl. All flavors work well together. Blend with whatever utensil you have. Comes out tasting different every time, but makes for an excellent meal and hopefully a fun blog.